Title: Rescue Me
Author: Wonderland
Rating: PG
Disclaimer:
Don’t own ‘em, wish I did, you know who does, yadda,
yadda, yadda
Summary: Friends with
bail money
Season/Spoiler info: Ascension
Author’s Notes: I had some college
buddies who always kept a couple hundred dollars stashed as emergency money.
Let us just assume that these fine officers
totally missed finding a symbiote pouch in their pre-imprisonment search and
that this occurs before enlightened police stations began to cheerfully accept
MasterCard. The ‘pansy-ass’ line is gleefully stolen from Angelverse.
“O’Neill, Teal’c. You made bail.” The
officer snaps from the other side of the bars.
“Yes!” I leap to my feet. “Thank you,
Daniel. And thank you, officer.”
“Keep your thanks, flyboy. And keep out
of my jail from now on. Get enough of you yahoos every payday.” The stone-faced
cop leads us out of the cell and into the waiting room, where Daniel is pacing
impatiently.
“Jack! You guys alright?”
“We were in jail, Daniel, not a Turkish
prison. Stop watching those kinds of movies.”
“I don’t watch those kinds of movies.” He
protests as he follows us out. “I’m parked over here.” He leads us to his screaming
red Jeep. I reach for the keys and he steps backward.
“I’m driving.” I snatch the keys.
He snatches them back. “I don’t think
so. You were charged with public drunkenness less than two hours ago. No way do
you drive my truck.”
“It’s a Jeep, Daniel, not a real truck.
Guys who can’t drive a stick drive Jeeps.” I crawl into the passenger seat
while Teal’c, who hasn’t said a word in a scary two hours, situates himself in
the back. He’s just mad because he lost his cowboy hat somewhere in tonight’s
melee. Daniel fastens his seatbelt and glares at me until I follow suit. I
finally break the heavy silence. “In hindsight, maybe you were right not to
come out with us tonight.”
“Really? When I declined your gracious
invitation, I seem to remember someone calling me a wimp, a loser and, what was
the other thing? Oh, yeah, a pansy-ass, I especially liked that one.” His voice
is past cold, borders on Arctic. He handles the Jeep easily and, loath though I
am to admit it, he handles the stick with a finesse born of years of
experience; I will keep forgetting that he drove at innumerable digs in sand
and mud and who knows what else.
I fidget. “Listen, Daniel, thank you
for bailing us out tonight. And I’m sorry I called you names, that was childish
of me.”
“Yes, it was.” His voice hasn’t warmed
in the least.
“Daniel Jackson, we are in your debt
for rescuing us from our unfortunate incarceration. If you will return with me to
my base quarters, I will gladly repay the money you have expended toward our
release.”
“Oh, you don’t owe me a penny.”
“Teal’c is right, you tell us what we
owe you and we’ll pay up.”
“I told you, you don’t owe me anything.
I didn’t have enough cash, Sam wasn’t answering her phone so I had to borrow
the money.”
Is it my imagination, or is there just
a hint of triumph in that voice? “So, who’d you hit up?”
We stop at a light, Daniel turns and
gives me a slow, slow smile. “General Hammond. Oh, and he said he’d like to see
both of you in his office in the morning at oh-eight-hundred.” The light turns
green and Daniel smoothly slides the Jeep into the intersection. “It’s true
what they say, revenge is sweet. Almost tastes like chocolate, don’t you agree,
Jack?”